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Writer's pictureMatthew Cossens

What Winning Is Really Like......


Recently our team at Technology People had their first, full day, team offsite and I used some content from Tim Grover and his 2nd book entitled ‘Winning’


I’ve previously written about his 1st book ‘Relentless’ here - https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/you-cleaner-quick-reflections-from-relentless-matthew-cossens/


His latest book gives you a raw and unfiltered view of what it takes to win and win consistently at an elite level.


So how does Tim and his clients describe winning? Their definition is “Uncivilised. Hard. Nasty. Unpolished. Dirty. Rough. Unforgiving. Unapologetic. Uninhibited. Everything. If that describes your journey, and how you attack your goals, then you are speaking the same language.”


I love his definition of Winning.


Personally, I see Winning (and winning consistently) as difficult, demanding, it’s about obstacles, it requires increasingly greater sacrifice. It’s the daily grind to chase after a taste from its cup. It’s not just early mornings and late nights. (it is all consuming!) It’s an infinite game, you can never win at winning. It’s a constant chase for greatness and understanding the difference between near perfect and perfect and always looking to bridge that gap. It’s a journey of commitment and work ethic that requires you to love Winning so much that the work to get there doesn’t matter.


I love the taste of winning but every time I win, I ask myself am I willing to do what it takes to win again. I have been blessed to have some championship moments in my life but there is nothing glorious about winning, the journey is tough and you have to be all in. If you are all in you love it though and can’t imagine living any other way.


If the above resonates with you then you know a thing or two about winning 😊


So where does it all start in my opinion?


Defining Your Win

What does winning look like for you? Really look like for you? Is it clear or a vague idea, direction or a loose goal? Does your definition have a way out?


You should know what winning looks like for you in Ultra HD, 8k, it should be crystal clear. The picture should be imprinted on your soul for the areas of your life that you want to win. Without this and obsession you will never find a way to win on a consistent basis.


Michael Jordan talks about winning on 3 levels – competing, accountability and winning at all levels. All levels means not just winning in one arena. Winning at all levels is:


  • You win in sports

  • You win in business

  • You win in your personal life

  • Other people win because you win! It’s not just about you, it’s about being able to hold a team and show them what it feels like to win.


That’s the mindset of winning. That’s what winning really looks like. If that definition doesn’t get you fired up then I don’t know what will!


So fill in the blanks, define your win.


Once you have clarity of your win, you then need to build the plan and optimise your T.T.I


What is your T.T.I?

I spoke with our team at our offsite about the separator between good and elite performance being your T.T.I


This is:


  • Talent

  • Time

  • Intensity



Let me give you a brief overview as we will go deeper in a future blog on this topic alone.


Talent – Know your strengths intimately, deliberately go out of your way to invest in these areas, daily! Make them worldclass. Understand the actions that you take daily that have the biggest impact on your results, invest in these, daily! All people have natural talent and can find out their strength areas but few put the time in to level up. Most people spend less than 1 hour per week actively developing their strengths. Elite performers have this as a daily routine and habit. Imagine if you moved to 1 hour per day. That’s 365 hours of development per year. Multiple this by 10 year and the gap you have on your competition is huge.


Time – You cannot cheat the grind. You have to put in the work. If you are doing 8 hour days the reality is that you are unlikely to win on a consistent basis. Studies of elite performance in all fields (when it comes to work) show that the best of the best are doing 60-65 hours in their craft alone. This doesn’t include growth and development. They find time for the areas in which they want to win.


Intensity – So you can do the hours…….great. But are you doing the hours with intensity? I will take 8 hours of someone at 100%+ over the 12 hour person at 50%. You have to have intensity and time. This is the difference maker. You need to train like it’s gameday. Have blocks of focus and full intensity. Tim Grover states this beautifully in one of his 13 rules for winning. Winning is not a marathon, it’s a sprint with no finish line!


T.T.I is the key in my opinion.


What Are You Willing To Sacrifice?


Everybody wants to win but few want to pay the price. Grant Cardone has a saying “Pay the price now, so that you can pay any price in the future”. But are you really willing to pay the price that winning requires?



Kobe would talk about winning being “Everything” and his “Obsession”. His work ethic was legendary. To be an elite performer in any field you need to be willing to look at your schedule, routine and habits and optimise them for the actions that matter. You will need to give up time with family, friends, sleep and direct all your energies towards your win.


What If You Lose?

When you fail, (and you will) the voice in your head will be screaming at you, feeding you excuses. You need to change your relationship and frame of losing. To win you must lose. You will lose consistently when honing your craft. Winning demands this of you. How bad do you want it? Learn from your loss, iterate and be obsessed with finding a way to win.


To learn more about winning and to hear the perspective of the coach of many elite superstars I suggest you check out Tim Grover’s book


Here is an overview of the 13 qualities that define winning from the book.


NUMBER 1) Winning makes you different, and different scares people.

NUMBER 1) Winning wages war on the battlefield in your mind.

NUMBER 1) Winning is the ultimate gamble on yourself.

NUMBER 1) Winning isn’t heartless, but you will use your heart less.

NUMBER 1) Winning belongs to them, and it’s your job to take it.

NUMBER 1) Winning wants all of you; there is no balance.

NUMBER 1) Winning is selfish.

NUMBER 1) Winning takes you through hell; if you quit, that’s where you’ll stay.


NUMBER 1) Winning is a test, with no correct answers.

NUMBER 1) Winning knows all your secrets.


NUMBER 1) Winning never lies.


NUMBER 1) Winning is not a marathon, it’s a sprint with no finish line.


NUMBER 1) Winning is everything.


I highly recommend that you pick yourself up a copy of Winning. It truly is a special read that will resonate with anyone who is looking to win in any area of their life. It has no fluff, is direct and will challenge you and all you believe that Winning is about.


His interview with Patrick Bet David and Tom Bilyeu are also worth checking out if you have the time.



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